Bri Colorful

Life Changing

Posted on: May 8, 2010

So today I called the local gym to ask what time a class I was interested in was at. The employee answered the phone, “Hello, Welcome to **** Gym, How can we change your life today?” I burst out laughing. I couldn’t help myself. “Oh, YOU’re going to change my life, are you?” Her smile was audible.

It got me thinking. Shouldn’t they say something more like, “how can we facilitate your life changing experience?” I mean, I know it’s a little wordy but it truly would be more accurate. I have to make the choice to come to the gym; I have to make the choice to eat healthy; I have to make one million and one good choices everyday. They can’t make the change for me.

That’s really how it is with everything. I’ve seen friends struggle with challenges so personal. They know what they can do to make their lives better. They even want to do those things. They don’t need my advice. They certainly don’t need my criticism – they accomplish that all on their own. What they need and should enjoy is my “facilitation” of their life changing experience. But instead of providing them with elipticals and yoga matts and healthy food, I have to give them my time and attention, my encouragement, my prayers, and most importantly my love.

That’s what I think I want when I’m trying to change my life by visually attaching devil’s horns to every chocolate bar I see. I want to know that I have love and support and friends behind me every step of the way. I need to know they love me no matter what. I don’t need or want someone to do the work for me. They can’t really. It’s up to me to make the change and the choices.

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11 Responses to "Life Changing"

So true! Amen and amen! Nothing is better then encouraging people and being encouraged by others! Love is the key too, as you said. Such an important thing to remember. It’s so easy to think we have always have the solutions to the problems of those around us, but I think most of the time people can figure things out with a little encouragement and advice when sought. People learn better that way too from what I understand. Love you sweetheart!

I think you’re right: “People learn better that way” — I had a math teacher who would give us a problem and we had to do our best to figure out the equation for solving it as a class before she would help us. Because we went through all the hard work and do our best and then come to her for prods in the right direction, we retained the formulas better. Because we had had to figure out the formula ourselves, it was like we owned that wisdom.

While there is MUCH to be said from learning from our elders and lessons from the past, sometimes I think we already know which pathway we should choose. Instead of a guide pointing the way or mother gently leading us by the hand, we need cheer-leading from the sidelines and people to love us even if we make the wrong decision. If we’re unsure of which direction to go, I think most of us will stop and ask for directions.

You said so beautifully the big lesson I’ve learned way later in life: that not only can you NOT change anyone but yourself – but you have NO RIGHT TO. I LOVE YOU just the way you are!!!!

Thank you Momsie! I love you too! I truly appreciate your support of everything Grant and I choose to do. Mothers have a unique role in nurturing, supporting, and encouraging their children and their spouse. I have cherished your example of loving without judgement. I’ve seen you loving porcupines until their quills fall out one by one. I may have even been such a porcupine at times. πŸ™‚

You are right. LOVE is the great motivator because it facilitates the change and desire to change. Encouragement, motivation, listening ear, love, a carrot instead of a candy bar – these are all the best ways to help someone grow the way they want to or need to. Good job Bri! Keep it up!

I like that: “Love is the great motivator” – Love should motivate all our actions, though we know that often it does’t. I think that is especially important in family relationships. Even discipline of children should be motivated by love. When Paul is orating to the Corinthians and he says he is not sorry for pointing out their sins in his previous letter because it motivated them to godly sorrow. (2nd Corinthians 7). It reminded me that as parents, we should try to discipline in a way that leads to godly sorrow and bespeaks our love for the child. What kind of discipline leads to godly sorrow? Can you think of any examples from your life or the scriptures?

Yes, yes and YES! You’re wonderful. And I think they should answer the phone like that, too. πŸ™‚

Thank you Sara! I think you’re pretty fantastic yourself! πŸ™‚

Oh nana I love you. Such a difficult lesson, and one of the most important. I have trouble still with the fact that I can’t change for others.
I love the life-changing phone experience, that’s awesome πŸ˜‰ If only the whole world spoke specific wordy sentences like my nana πŸ˜‰ hehehe

Ha ha. Then we would be like the Ents in Lord of the Rings and we’d never get any where (Am I a nerd for knowing what an Ent is?) . . . On the other hand, we might not have physical wars, because we’d spend a century trying to figure out a diplomatic solution and by the time we figure out that we’ll never agree, we’d wouldn’t remember what we were arguing about in the first place. πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

ROFL If you are then I am too πŸ˜‰ I love Ents!
And I know thats true cuz that’s how it ends up whenever we argue about anything hahahaha

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